Awards

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The following is a list of the tentative awards that could be received by some (unlucky) few. Currently in development, this page will be under construction as we determine which of these worthless pieces of salvaged trash we actually want to give out.

The Infinity Cup[edit | edit source]

The final prize awarded to the ultimate winner of the Infinity Cup: a worthless jaypeg of a star on your emblem, 15 minutes of fame and the eternal butthurt of all the other boards targeting your own. Never forget what the wise men at SEGA of Bongistan once said: It's not the Winnin', it's the Rubbin' it in!

Recipient Board Competition Notes
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2015 Summer Infinity Cup The winners of the Inaugural Cup, notable for the yuge amount of goals scored by all teams
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2015 Winter Infinity Cup Considered to be a controversial and suspicious victory, /leftypol/ took the second Cup on the back of smothering defense and incisive strikes on offense. There's little to no evidence that remains of any impropriety on /leftypol/'s part, though a common theory is that the GK scandal from the prior Cup was executed again and went undetected. Some remain pretty salty about this victory, others point to the fact that they've yet to actually defend the title or even appear in a game since.
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2018 Summer Infinity Cup First Cup to be played without Cotton as the host. Served as a revival of the Infinity Cup, under the new name The 8chan Cup
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2019 Winter Infinity Cup The first (and hopefully only) Cup to be played on Australian internet, /christian/ shocked the world and took home back to back Cups.
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2019 Summer Infinity Cup A Cup nearly doomed thanks to a targeted attack on the site, /kind/ shocked the world, first knocking off the defending champions in the Seminfinals then claiming victory in a nerve-wracking penalty shootout in the Final.
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2020 Summer Infinity Cup In a Cup with half of the field being either brand new, or non-participants in the prior Cup, uncertainty abounds. /fascist/ rose above the competition, proving themselves the betters of teams both new and old, and that they were truly the biggest of guys, defeating /bane/ in the Final.

The Golden Boot[edit | edit source]

A boot-shaped faux gold cup awarded to the player with the most goals scored throughout the Cup.

Recipient Player Team Goal Tally Competition Notes
DIO BRANDO A icon.png
/a/
11 2015 Summer Infinity Cup The first ever Golden Boot ended up being shared by a vampire and a converted Roman, in an incredible turn of events.
St. Paul Christian icon.png
/christian/
Stannis Tv icon.png
/tv/
10 2015 Winter Infinity Cup Stannis led the way for /tv/, scoring 5 goals in the Group Stage (including a 4 goal game) and another five in the Knockout Round, which included a hat trick in the Semifinals.
Swolecard Strek icon.png
/strek/
8 2018 Summer Infinity Cup The third edition of the Cup saw the Golden Boot split again, this time by the captain of the Starship Enterprise and a fucking wolfman from a children's TV show.
Lupo Lucio Ita icon.png
/ita/
G-d Collins Genesis icon.png
/genesis/
9 2019 Winter Infinity Cup The 4th edition of the Cup was rocked by several debut teams, and no individual player had more of an impact than G-d Collins, lead striker for /genesis/.
St. Peter Christian icon.png
/christian/
10 2019 Summer Infinity Cup The second /christian/ player to earn the honor, St. Peter dominated opponents throughout the 5th edition of the Cup, highlighted by a 4 goal performance in the Round of 16 vs. /ausneets/.
Alfred Legosen Lego icon.png
/lego/
6 2020 Summer Infinity Cup The 6th edition of the Cup saw its first ever 3-way split of the Boot, with three different team captains sharing the awards with 6 goals apiece.
Ammit Monster icon.png
/monster/
Cuckquean-tan Cuckquean icon.png
/cuckquean/

The Golden Touch[edit | edit source]

A different-looking, boot-shaped faux gold cup awarded to the player with the most assists during the Cup.

Recipient Player Team Assist Tally Competition Notes
St. Paul Christian icon.png
/christian/
5 Summer 2019 Infinity Cup The first Infinity Cup where assists were fully tracked, the Golden Touch was fittingly won by St. Paul who shared the Golden Boot the first time it was awarded.
Benito Mussolini Fascist icon.png
/fascist/
5 2020 Summer Infinity Cup A player much-maligned through the 6th Cup, /fascist/'s stalwart Pos-LWF.png rolled into perfect form just in time for the Knockout Stage, posting all 5 of his assists in the do-or-die round.

The Golden Glove[edit | edit source]

A pure gold plated latex glove for all your fist-based needs. Awarded to the GK deemed to have performed the best throughout the whole Cup.

Recipient Player Team Games Played Saves Keeper Coefficient Competition Notes
Doom Co icon.png
/co/
7 24 1.14 Summer 2019 Infinity Cup Despite giving up 6 goals, tied for most through the Group Stage, Doom and /co/ settled down just in time for the Knockout Stage, giving up only 2 goals through the bracket. Doom's 24 saves were by far the most in the tournament, 7 more than the nearest competitor.
Charles Maurras Fascist icon.png
/fascist/
6 15 1.16 2020 Summer Infinity Cup An impressive, opening game shutout of eternal powerhouse /christian/ was just the beginning for Maurras. A shaky performance vs. /lego/ nearly made it all for naught, but /fascist/'s keeper tightened the screws and gave up only one goal per game from the Quarterfinals through to the Finals. His rock solid performances between the posts were crucial to /fascist/'s eventual victory.

The Golden Ball[edit | edit source]

Awarded to the player who performed best in the Knockout Stage of the Cup.

Recipient Player Team Competition Notes
Anti-Bully Ranger Kind icon.png
/kind/
Summer 2019 Infinity Cup A somewhat controversial pick for the MVP, given the near-fatal miss in the penalty shootout that decided the Cup, Anti-Bully Ranger was still a crucial piece to /kind/'s run to glory. With 4 goals and 2 assists during the Knockout Stage, including what some called the Goal of the Tournament, Anti-Bully Ranger's efforts were more than enough to earn the honor.
Cuckquean-tan Cuckquean icon.png
/cuckquean/
2020 Summer Infinity Cup It's not often a player with zero points in the Group Stage contends for Golden Boot, let alone Golden Ball, but Cuckquean-tan's 6 goal, 2 assist performance through the Knockout Stage put her name on both trophies. Highlighted by what was almost Goal of the Tournament against /ausneets/, a hat trick against /yuri/, and the dagger goal in the 3rd Place Game, the debut Cup for her and her team was one to remember, even if it didn't start out that way.

The Golden Screw[edit | edit source]

An award in the shape of a giant Phillips screw, meant to be given to the team or player who was absolutely and utterly screwed out of a positive result through no fault of their own. Initially inspired by the win taken away from /argentina/ in the 2018 Summer Infinity Cup thanks to a PES crash, and again by /u/ suffering a similar fate in the 2019 Winter Infinity Cup the Golden Screw was first awarded at the end of the 2019 Summer Infinity Cup.

Recipient Competition Notes
(You) 2019 Summer Infinity Cup In an irony of ironies, the Cup where the Golden Screw was first awarded saw no scumfuckery from PES, and the game was on its best behavior throughout the tournament. However, given the events related to our home site leading up to the tournament, and the resulting chaos and disorder, the Golden Screw ended up being awarded to every anon involved in the Cup, from the organizers and commissioner, to every humble anon who just wanted to watch. We wanted no trouble. We just wanted our home.
Latecomfy icon.png Sweet Dreams 2020 Summer Infinity Cup The own goal is one of the cruelest fates of divegrass. Stripping all effort away from the attackers who fought to score, and converting it entirely into blame for one defending player. Such is the story for /late/ & /comfy/'s keeper Sweet Dreams. A 90+1' effort from /cuckquean/'s My Sister bounced in off the rookie netminder, took the single point from his team, which by coincidence would have been enough to see /late/ & /comfy/ through to the Knockout Stage had the result held. Some say My Sister's shot was going in anyway, and that Sweet Dreams was just doing his job. The Gods of Divegrass disagree, and we recognize his burden by awarding him the Golden Screw

The Jade Clock[edit | edit source]

Sometimes mistaken for "the jaded cock", it's a joint award for the Teams who played the best match of the cup. A good match includes a nice back and forth, a lot of goals (or really cool ones), a spectacle of colors and emotions from both teams, individual feats that are unusual for the game, a matchup that seems very unlikely or that most people wanted to happen, high participation from most board dwellers and overall the highlighting of all the aspects that make watching simulated divegrass a joy for everyone involved. As a subjective award, the 8ChanCup Streaming Committee can pick and choose any match, especially if they like to rig them.

Recipients Final Score Competition Notes
Eris icon.png/eris/ & Sp icon.png/sp/
Group F Match
4-4 2020 Summer Infinity Cup A back and forth affair that saw quick goals, stupid goals, funny goals and more, /eris/ vs. /sp/ delivered on each's respective promise to bring a unique and offensive team to the tournament. Highlighted by a yellow to /eris/'s keeper Principa Discordia, that gifted /sp/ a go-ahead PK, this game had fans glued to their screens the whole time.

Potential Awards[edit | edit source]

These awards are just ideas for now, might implement them, might not.

The Silver Lining[edit | edit source]

A stormy cloud filled with all the curses by the "best loser" of the cup, conveniently pre-translated in Grawlixes (that's swearing in longhand for you, asterisk-mouths). Awarded to the Team who lost at the Final match. Don't worry, there's always next year, chuck.

The Bronze Towel[edit | edit source]

This award goes to the Team who won the 3rd Place Mini-Final at the end of the 8ChanCup. Worthless as it is, at least you're not the jerks who couldn't win their final match.

The Granite Tombstone[edit | edit source]

"Here lies the hopes and dreams of the Team who lost the 3rd Place Mini-Final. They never scored."

The Platinum Lube[edit | edit source]

A very special award for the Team that conceded the most goals, either in a single match or throughout the cup, AND/OR dropped their spaghetti at a critical point, leading to a snowball effect that cost them a lot (ultimately the Cup). The bottle symbolizes the opponents' players metaphorically applying unguents to ease their penetration of the enemy defenses, as well as the massive butthurt by the losing team's board. As a subjective award, this also includes teams whose boards flipped a tit at losing or otherwise acted in a very tilted manner during their matches.

The Special Snowflake Plaque[edit | edit source]

An award to the Team and/or member of the cup who made it special in one or more ways. These include one or more of the following:

  • Having made detailed kits, more than just their home jersey;
  • Having created custom players that go beyond just naming them differently;
  • Being the underdog in the competition and surprising everyone with their performance;
  • Displaying fair play throughout the cup, even if it was not beneficial to them;
  • Contributing extensively to the Full Chan Cup, on the boards, the wiki, the streams and the OC;
  • Coming from an unusual board with a cool idea for a team;
  • Bringing an extra dose of fun even to people who do not hail from the same place as them;

It basically boils down to acknowledging those who made the 8Cup special and not just "the 4chancup but with twenty spectators tops".

The Un-Fair Play Star of David Award[edit | edit source]

Also known as the Leftypol Award, this bust of a particularly happy merchant represents the Team who acted the worst throughout the cup. Since this is the most sought-after silver, there's more than one way to achieve it, including one (or more! Get creative!) of the following means:

  • Having extremely unlikeable and unsportsmanlike manners, both on and off the pitch;
  • Using cheesy tactics or overall making a mockery of the sport by being incompetent, malicious or flat out evil when handling your board's team (or other people's!);
  • Enacting Dragongate;
  • Cheating, in any form, be it by buffing your own players, debuffing other teams', changing their game plan in ways that shouldn't be legal, conveniently ignoring the 8ChanCup Streaming Committee's rulings, trying to co-opt the Committee itself, hacking, cracking, slacking, DDOS-ing the streams, flooding them with dissent, catfishing as other boards or as the manager of another board, rigging, being Mark or simply existing and being already unlikeable at the time of the Cup's matches;
  • Being found out cheating and not accepting the fact, deleting the evidence afterwards;
  • Not acknowledging a negative result for your team or conveniently scrubbing it off to better suit your needs;
  • Pretending other boards are doing it too so you can get a free pass;
  • Editing the wiki to scrub off anything that may incriminate you or your team;
  • Being a nuisance to other boards by your mere existence, or by maliciously interjecting in their own affairs and forcing them to have a team that doesn't reflect their personal board culture;
  • Being a Goon;

The award is informally dedicated to /leftypol/, a team and a board that caused so many damn problems since its inception that they may as well be banned for life and from life.

The Aquamarine Microphone[edit | edit source]

The final award, a self masturbatory icon to commemorate the one (or more) guy(s) who made the cup possible in the first place. Awarded to the Host(s) of the Cup and the correlated Board Owner(s).